The Hawg Jaw Rap
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This is just a pipe dream that I made up off the top of my head,
Even old men need to fantasize a little bit before they are dead.
I guess I could have used young ladies instead of old women,
But, my old heart would never hold out with young chicks herein.
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The Hawg Jaw Rap
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Sometimes old Hawg Jaw really gets right on down,
And those old women get so jiggly all over the town.
They shake around those old saggy wrinkled boobs.
As I turn that really hep old Hawg Jaw rap loose.
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When I hit that hardwood dance floor ready to start,
The old ladies tremble and most hold their own heart,
Fearing it will be too much excitement causing an attack.
As Hawg Jaw shakes his legs to begin that old man rap.
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“Hey all you old chicks out there looking so very fine,
If you’re nice to me, I might just shake my cute little hind,
I know this will surely give you all a great big ole thrill,
Even though most of you old gals are way over the hill.”
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“I’ll do that Fred Shuffle especially for all you old ladies,
With those cute little butt swings that drive you crazy.
You’ll just love all those moves right from the start,
Then I’ll top that all off with a great big old loud fart.”
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Whoa, look out, one old woman went down to the floor,
She’s rolling around yelling “Hawg Jaw I want some more,”
It’s tough when they all idolize you chanting your name,
When you’ve got it, flaunt it, It’s the name of the game.
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About that time I decided to rap off the top of my head,
I would entice one of those old ladies with the rap I said.
So I devised a plan to get them in a big frenzy that night,
With a little rap that might just cause an old woman fight.
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“Hey girls, would you all like to roll in the hay,
With old Hawg Jaw on this beautiful fine day?
I can only take about one gal a month at my age,
So you all decide who goes first with no rage.”
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The old women looked at each other and one did say,
“We’d all rather be dead that to roll with you in the hay,
We just do this to get away from hubby for a while,
Having fun rapping with you old man, it’s the new style.”
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This deeply hurt my ego right down to the very core,
But I thought “well, what the hell, let’s rap some more.”
So I told the ladies, “this sounds good to old Hawg Jaw,
Here’s another rap verse to start the new fun for all.”
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“”Let’s keep all our clothes on today ladies, I suppose,
As our bodies are too fat, wrinkled, and ugly exposed.
But we can still dance and act like we’re so very crazy,
As it is much better than staying home being so lazy.”
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By Bill
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Thanks for reading The Hawg Jaw Rap,
Bill