Cutting The Cheese

 

I don’t know what you all think about cutting the cheese now,
But it is a natural thing that we all do after we eat some chow,
It’s not a subject some people want to hear too much about,
So I’ll make this poem short so I just won’t gross you all out.

 

 

 

 

Cutting The Cheese

 

If you’ve ever cut into one of those big blocks of blue cheese,
You get a strong burst of aroma that burns your nose with ease.
I guess this why when someone lets a big old odor laden fart,
Someone asks “who cut the cheese” as that bad smell starts.

 

 

 

A full elevator is one of the worst places you can cut the cheese
You watch the riders eyes as that fart slips out silently with ease
And the refried bean fart smell fills the space burning their noses
Making them all squirm into all kind of funny looking poses.

 

 

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Someone says what is that nasty smell and the chatter starts,
They all suspect each other of ripping a big old smelly fart.
I can hardly keep from laughing as the rumblings don’t end.
They all clear the premises so fast after the elevator door opens.

 

 

 

I wonder who cut the cheese?

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Another bad place to stir things up a bit by cutting the cheese,
Is in the closed car when it’s so cold outside that you will freeze
If anyone opens that window to clear out that awful rotten smell,
So the odor hangs and everyone suffers more than they will tell.

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Now that is rank, something crawled up inside of you and died.

 

Sometimes when we go gamble at the Indian casinos here,
There is a smart ass cigar smoker that sits in the adjacent chair,
After I have had brown beans, I am armed with a stronger smell.
I ease one out and he hits the road fast on his way out of hell.

 

 

 

I got some bad beef lasagna the other day at the Italian place,
It filled me with rotten gas and gave me a bad stomach ache,
I was so relieved when I started to pass that awful rank gas.
Pam was not too happy and told me to put a cork in my ass.

 

 

 

 

As we get older it seems that the cheesy aroma is getting worse.
Sometimes Pam kicks me out of bed with with words of curse,
So I head for the big boy chair and let all that gas out there,
My farts don’t smell that bad to me, I wonder if it was the beer?

 

 

 

Let’s face it, we all still cut the cheese from the things we eat,
Most people try to hide it, but the smell usually brings the heat.
It’s not a bad thing if it gives you some relief in your tummy,
But most people out there will still think that it is not very funny.

Dang Brenda, did you cut the cheese again. Must be something that you ate.

 

 

 

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By Bill

 

 

 

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Thanks for reading Cutting The Cheese,
Bill